The End of an Era

The End of an Era

I suppose somewhere down the line, it was always going to happen, but when you are finally presented with the facts then it’s sometimes quite hard to process them.

Over the last couple of weeks, I have been in contact with my surgeon and had another meeting with him yesterday to review my knee and the operation that I had back in February. He was really pleased with the way the operation went and in terms of general mobility and day-to-day life then we are pretty much back to normal, albeit still with a little swelling and discomfort as the wounds heal up fully – all to be expected and I am very grateful for that.

This is how a healthy normal knee is structured:


However, in terms of “sporting activities” it’s not such great news – actually that is not quite correct, I should say in terms of “competitive” sports the news isn’t great – I can still ride my bike and exercise but with caution.

With meniscus injuries they grade the damage one to four with four being the worst level of injury. Yesterday, the surgeon took me through the whole process showing my the x-rays done before the op and how it looked during the process.

Effectively I had lost all my cartilage at the front of my knee, simply gone – there was then a Grade 4 tear which needed a fair amount of work to trim it up – the remainder of the injury was assessed as Grade 2 – in his words “very traumatic”.

Although the damaged areas were repaired, there is still no cartilage at the front of my knee and that means we have a bone-on-bone scenario, which means the potential for pain and swelling is huge for any long periods of exercise, or for regular hard efforts – basically what I would have called “training” so the advice is to back it all off and just go out and “ride” my bike for the enjoyment of it, but limit the rides to around 90 mins to help protect the joint.

Running is completely out of the window and to be fair the surgeon said that from day one when he first got all the scans back, so I guess he kinda knew what the future was for me at that point.

I have to say the news hit me quite hard really – no more competition, no more long bike rides – well, I obviously still can do those kind of things, but it will lead to days of swelling and pain and future damage that could affect day to day life so what’s the point in that.

I sat in the car park as the news processed in my mind and I thought, well, that’s that then and I then started to think of all that achieved, and do you know what – I have done alright …

1988 – Toured Australia with Wigan Colleges playing 7 matches out there winning four and losing three

1989-1993 – played at the highest level in amateur rugby league, played for Wigan, Lancashire county and Great Britain, toured France and won there.

1993-1995 – played professional rugby league for Oldham RLFC at the same level as today’s “Super League”

1994 – Rode the length of Britain – John O’Groats to Lands End – covered over 1000 miles in just 9 days on a mountain bike raising over £8,000 for Wigan Hospice.

1995-1997 – transferred for £10,000 to Chorley RLFC playing a difficult couple of years as a major back injury took its toll (more later on this)

2006 – started to train for Ironman which is a triathlon with a 3.8km open water swim, a 180km bike ride and then a marathon at the end to finish

2007 – completed Ironman UK in Sherborne in Dorset in a time of 13hrs and 01mins

2008-2012 – completed 3 more Ironman UK events, this time close to home in Bolton, working with “Team True Spirit” (I was part of the original team that formed the organisation) – we raised over £50,000 for service charities and transformed one veteran into a Paralympian.

When I sit there and look at that list, I have to be happy don’t I – I have to be really proud and pleased with the levels I reached and the things I managed to do.

But then I can also draw up a list of injuries from the rugby days:

1988 – Major concussion, lost a full days memory and still cannot remember a thing

1990-1997 – the original injury was landing on a wooden square corner flag as I was twisting over to score – I couldn’t walk for 3 days and missed the whole of the next season – I struggled lots with it over the next few years, eventually retiring in 1997 – the x-ray showed the discs twisted 9mm one way and leaning over 5mm another way

1993 – hairline fracture of my jaw, very minor but the jaw clicks to this day

1994 – broken and dislocated middle finger (put back in place in the tunnel during the match) – basically top half of the finger was pointing back at me as I looked at it.

1994 – torn and frayed groin/pelvic muscles, requiring minor surgery to correct

1995 – big broken nose (I had suffered two minor breaks previously) – this one was a real smash in the face – again put back into place in the dressing room at half time – lots of blood and tears on that one

1995 – clash of heads and a gaping cut over my eye – eight stitches by the doctor in the medical room in the tunnel at Oldham, bandage on and back on to the field to finish the match off. (as they did back then).

1993-1995 – both left and right ankle ligaments torn, both requiring periods of about 6-8 weeks on the sideline.

When you look at the list of injuries, then really I have done well to do all the bike riding and triathlon stuff at all – it’s fair to say that my 48 year old body has been put through the rigours along its sporting career.

So, where does that leave me now? Well it leaves me to enjoy short local bike rides I guess, lots of lovely Lancashire lanes for me to trundle around and it will allow me more time to focus on the photography which at the moment is going really well and the business continues to grow.

A little bit of me is sad and disappointed, but it is what it is and we need to move on and into the next exciting chapter probably with a Canon piece of kit in my hand rather than a pair of carbon wheels, but that is still pretty exciting for me.

As the gloom lifted, I grabbed my kit bag and headed out in the evening sunshine to bury myself deep in a hedge and photograph the local Southport 10 mile time trial and as the sun shone down, I allowed myself a little wry smile – you know what, life is good and whilst it is the end of an era, there is another one ahead, just as good.

Make it Happen!

Beyond Belief !

Beyond Belief !

At the moment, I am just so frustrated and disappointed, quite numb actually and really am at the end of my tether.

For the last 4 months I have worked so hard, trained consistently and made sure that I kept all my sports massage appointments – the body was strong and all was set for a wonderful day in the Pyrenees and then …..


For the last week I have been struggling big time, hard to walk with the knee in lots of pain .. swelling and a total lack of stability around the joint. The most annoying part is that I cannot put it down to one single event, no trip over a kerbstone, no banging it into a table, no unfortunate twist .. nothing at all.

I finished my last hilly training session and from then on it has just deteriorated to the point that I have had to withdraw from the event. Closer examination has revealed more cartilage damage but now that the swelling has started to go down, at least we seem to be able to rule out ligament tears.

I have been told no bike riding now for an extended time and a regime of specific exercises and rehab, strengthening the joint. I need to be back on the anti-inflam’s and lots of ice … the physio suggested swimming would be a good option for me, so I guess its time for some more new goggles and more splashing around.

All that work, the best fitness on a bike for nearly 10 years and then this out of nowhere … really it gutting.

It has made me think hard about my “competitive” future, which I guess is now finally over … the 10 years of top level rugby league and then 10 years of ironman training has finally caught up with me – the list of injuries I have had is long and I have to face up to that.

In the short term, I need to recover from this setback and then take stock, but I have hung up the “events and races” boots and retired any idea of adventures or long distance extravaganzas. I think it’s time to really just enjoy the bike for what it is and not worry about trying to prove I can still hack it, cos clearly I can’t.

The Tour de France starts tomorrow, I should have been there, but sometimes life takes a different route and for me that dream is over. I am really looking forward to the race itself, although Stage 8 will be hard to watch.

It’s beer time tonight, I need it.

It’s 2016 and already lots of changes !

The new year generally tends to mean two  things for me, a reorganisation of the various projects I have in place and also some focus on my fitness and plans for racing in the coming year.

Well, lets start with the reorganisation and particularly with my photography – I took a year out last year to try a couple of new things and a bit of diversity, some of which worked some of which didn’t but that was kind of the whole reason for doing it.

All that work lead me to the creation of my new website, where I will now focus all my photographic work – Martin Holden Images – centralising and simplifying lots of the work I have done over the last couple of years. This will now be the main focus area for my images.

martin holden images website

I am also quite looking forward to getting back to taking some images at races, something that I have missed over the last 12 months and whilst I won’t bombard the site with those images, it will be nice to build a portfolio of them going forward now – there are still over 13,000 images of cycling on my Flickr page and all those will stay there too.

Now on to the not-so-good news …. unfortunately the knee problems I had back in September have flared up again, following a short run I did last week – a very gentle 5km jog really but I was in real pain the next day and the pain did not go away for the rest of the week – time to visit the physio.

I have torn my posterior capsule (cartilage at the rear of my knee) – at this point we don’t think it needs surgery, but until all the swelling and inflammation has gone that’s not 100% but it does look hopeful on that front at least. We can then start the weeks of rehab that it will need, but and this is a pretty big but, if I start running again then it will get worse and will almost certainly need an operation, which in itself is no guarantee.

Cycling is fine, no pain, no issues afterwards and no impact.

That makes is a fairly easy decision.

The running shoes are hung up for good and I have retired from triathlon, after 10 very enjoyable years and 4 Ironman finishers medals and lots of great fun.

And so now for the next couple of weeks, its time to hit the anti-inflammatories, do the physio work and get back on the bike.


Testing it Out …

It’s been a really busy week and despite a couple of attempts I haven’t been able to get an appointment with my physio, but maybe I actually don’t need to.

The additional rest has given the joint some time to calm down and it seems much better now and I think it might be ok to test it out with a gentle run.


Hopefully it will be just a little reaction to the faster pace and will have healed itself, but I guess that only time will tell. It certainly isn’t causing me any issues in my normal day to day life, so I am hoping it will react well to a easy run.

I still have the option of visiting the physio if it reacts badly but I will test it out first and see what happens …


Something not right …

I enjoyed my morning bike ride yesterday, but the knee was a little sore, nothing to stop me pedalling but certainly not 100% right.

There is swelling at the back of the knee and this morning it feels like there might be some at the front too …. kinda like the feeling when you “lock” your knee joint out.


It’s a little frustrating as my fitness levels are excellent and my weight is beginning to come down and the inches are reducing also.

But it is important to tackle these little niggles (which I am convinced this is all that this is) immediately before they develop into anything more long term.

I am fortunate that I have a team of physio’s attached to my gym and they have always been excellent for me, so I will make an appointment with them later today to have a look at the possible issues.

Once I know what the issue is, then I can tackle it properly – in the meantime it has to be a case of feet up and rest, which for me is a real killer.

Knowing the Signs …

The week started well for me with two good runs, both of which felt very easy and comfortable and both were done at a decent pace (5.30) and (5.44) which although by no means pacey, certainly much quicker than I have been running of late.

Both of the runs were over mixed terrain, in fact both runs were the same 4km course … a mix of tarmac, rough gravel trails, grass, mud, downhills and inclines .. pretty much everything thrown in the mix.

I started to notice something on Wednesday when I got up:


The image is probably a bit misleading as there was no real pain, more like it felt like the knee or maybe top of the calf was slightly swollen .. it didn’t look swollen but it felt that way. Also when I was sat in one place for a while as I tend to do at work, then it was stiff and achy to get moving.

Perhaps two fast paced days back to back caused the issue, but I decided to listen to my body and just back it off a little until this weekend. The knee has been fine but there is still a little twinge there at the back, more near the calf I think that the knee itself. It may also just be the muscles and tendons getting used to running again, so this will be one to watch over I think.

Back to some more positive news now, and I have just completed 3 weeks without any sugar and I have cracked that one … my coffee’s are just great as they are and that is a big achievement to have put that one to bed. One refined product out of my diet.

Next up, I have just completed 2 weeks without any white bread, which for anyone who knows my love of the stuff is quite unbelievable … there have been a couple of times where I nearly went off the rails, but I have to say I feel so much better for not having any – in fact I have pretty much avoided any bread at all … two days out of fourteen I have had a couple of slices of wholemeal brown bread, but there are certainly no cravings for it – need to keep on with this, as this will bring big results.

Today will see some mountain biking with my community cycling club first thing and then may something else a little later on depending how the knee feels after this mornings ride.

Oh, and its pouring down with rain too, which of course I absolutely LOVE !!! Bring on the autumn and winter with its rain and howling gales – the perfect training weather for me.